Sometimes some things fall apart so that better things can fall together. This is thoughtful :)
For the past couple of weeks i’ve felt so alone and so lost. I haven’t been able to fall asleep on time because i’m too busy drowning in all these thoughts. I don’t know what i’m doing or what i’m saying because nothing really makes sense to me anymore. For so long I have wanted to feel needed, loved by someone else. Then, when I have gotten the chance, I disregard it. I pick it up and throw it away like it’s nothing because to me that’s what it always is .. nothing. It so hard giving every bit of you into trying to make something work when there’s a chance that it wont turn out the way you want it to. But then again, there’s always that chance. I’ve tried so hard to feel this way and I can’t. I can’t manage to put myself together for you because I simply can’t. Everyone has been asking me about you and I dodge the topic. I don’t want to speak about it, about you, about us, about anything that revolves around it. This is the hardest thing to write because believe me, there’s nothing harder to do than to try and put every single one of one’s emotion on a piece of paper. I don’t know how to say what I want to say or even worse, what I really want to say. I just know that I wish I could freely put myself out there for you so that you could hold me and put me near your heart. But, I can’t. I can’t do any of that because I simply .. just .. can’t. I don’t know what to tell you and i don’t know what to say. I just don’t know what to do. I wish I could take myself out of this place i’m in and leave without telling anyone and make a brand new life for myself. I would meet new people, see new places and experience new things. I want to change my entire life around and i’m willing to do just that. I want to make a new world for myself where my emotions would run free forever and ever.
It feels so good knowing both of us are starting things with a different mind set. Thank you for your sincere apology. Chances are beautiful when you work for them. Thank you for your constant care in my life and for looking out for me.
Love always, me ..
Lmao, Jo tried to play me. Na na na. Too funny though!
I feel so lucky to have people who genuinely appreciate me! Thank you.
What I do to make my friends laugh when they’re down. Dominican jokes are always awesome.
3rd Graders at the Christmas Party .. with glow sticks! MADNESS
I’m so grateful for all I have. I have the most amazing parents in the world. My mother is the foundation of my life and without her I’d be nothing. She’s the craziest shortest thing ever. She makes me want to pull my hair out but my god, I love her. She gives my life meaning and i’m thankful for all she does and says, even if I don’t appreciate it at the moment, in the end i’m so grateful. My father is my ultimate hero and i’m so lucky to have him. He works so hard and so much to give me all I have. He’s so strict and so old fashion but i’m grateful for that because thanks to that i’ve been raised into the well respected lady I am today. I love you momma, I love you poppa. I’m so grateful for my little sister! She’s the best thing that has happened to me. We fight every day of our lives and it’s madness but she gives my life meaning. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have her to argue and laugh with. Yanill, I love you so much. You’re my everything and i’m so blessed to have you as my sister. I’m so thankful and grateful for my friends! I know I can count on you all. Thank you for loving me as I am. You guys are the icing to my life! And lastly, i’m grateful for my education, my health, my life and GOD. There are no words for all you’ve given me and how many blessings you give me daily. I have never ending faith in you my god, you are everything.
And, i’m so grateful for you my tumblr fam! You guys inspire me with your thoughts, charisma and positive vibes. Thank you for all the laughs and smiles! Enjoy today next to everyone you love and enjoy the turkey or the veggies (to the vegetarians) Love ya, GOD BLESS XOXO
Everyone today keeps telling me that i’ve changed. That i’ve forgotten them and that it seems like i’m no longer their friends or don’t care about them. And i’m all like, whatever. Things have changed, life is so much different. Then, people tell me that we should chill or hang out because they miss me and it’s been months since we’ve last chill, gone out and had fun. But you didn’t hit me up 3 months ago to tell me this right? I don’t do seasonal friendships and I don’t do seasonal friends. My shit it’s a for life kind of thing UNLESS somehow it fucks up. If because i’m a straight forward person and I have change my mentality to Idgaf makes me a changed person then whatever, I guess I’ve changed. I guess i’m different.
But, whatever. None of you put a roof over my head or pay my bills, so you’re opinion isn’t requested NOR needed.
Don’t let the door hit you on your way out of my life. Goodbye.
